today i heard 2 kids talking about buying fake IDs after school and so i started eavesdropping cuz u know thats big kid stuff and then one was like “yeah but is all this really worth it like im pretty sure the fake IDs cost more than the fish we r gonna buy”
to buy fish at petco u have to be 18 or older
they were going to get fakes to buy fish
Clearly she wears those short skirts and skimpy tank tops because she wants the d. and by d I mean vitamin d. she wants to soak up as much sun as she can. because revealing clothes are not an invitation for sex u prick
and the award for unexpected turns goes to
what really sucks is when you know you should be doing something but physically cannot bring yourself to do it no matter how important doing that thing is
I’ve realized that you can’t really hack someone’s tumblr like you can on Facebook. On Facebook you can update a status to say, “I like dick in the eyeball,” and everyone would be freaked out. On tumblr, people would be like, “yeah man me too.” Then post a gif from supernatural.
Day 21: Night
#tapetum lucidum is the name of a layer of tissue in the eye of some animals that reflects light back through the retinas #causing the phenomenon known as ‘eyeshine’. #it allows for superior night vision and for this reason is usually found in nocturnal animals #especially carnivores #and those that hunt their prey at night.
i didn’t download all this bullshit for three notes
"step on a Lego" sounds like a weak ass insult but if you’ve ever actually stepped on a Lego you’d understand that there’s a moment between stepping on it and regaining your senses where you actually pray for death
♫ it’s going down, i’m yelling Simba ♫
IT’S BEEN 20 YEARS
WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS BEEN 20 YEARS
oh my god…
we need to sacrifice somebody so Ellen never dies
ALL OF THEM SO SHE LIVES EVEN LONGER THAN FOREVER!!!!
you forgot perez hilton
why is bob short for robert
how does one get ‘billy’ out of ‘william’?
How in hell do you get “Dick” from “Richard”?
you ask him nicely
you ask him nicely
i have been waiting for yEARS FOR THIS POST TO COME BACK YOU DONT UNDERSTAND
There’s a kid in my class named Richard Hunter
IT’S FUCKING BACK
Instant Date Prank
this is the gay agenda
I love vintage stuff but I’m so glad I can enjoy them in the 21st century with my iphone, wifi and slightly more human rights
somebody gets it.
My dad just came into my room and shouted at me in Klingon.
Am I more embarrassed that he did that or that I know he said I was a disappointment to the empire?
You should be most embarrassed that you’re a disappointment to the empire.